Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Attention: Pro-Life Community

The pro-life community needs to be talking about adoption and miscarriage! The Archdiocese has services for those who have experienced an abortion but none for those who have experienced a miscarriage. Absolutely ridiculous! This is one of the biggest archdiocese in the country and nothing for those who have miscarried or are experiencing infertility on any level. That is unacceptable! Good thing this lady  moved to my neck of the woods so we could put our heads together to start something.

There is a ministry through the respect life office, dedicated to helping those women who have chosen abortion to start the healing process. What about the women who lost a child not by choice?! Don't get me wrong I know these women need help to heal, after all they did lose a child. There are so many aspects of abortion that I don't claim to understand and I fully support a ministry that aids women in a crisis pregnancy and who help families heal from an abortion. I just think that we as pro-lifers need to support families who have lost a child through miscarriage. So when we have masses and prayer vigils for the unborn who have died we should include those children who were miscarried or stillborn.

In the hunt for an adoption agency and adoption information I contacted a couple of pro-life pregnancy centers whose aim is to encourage the mother to choose life. They direct the women to either raise their child or give their child up for adoption. I hear that they rarely choose adoption and choose to parent or abort. As someone who is trying to be an adoptive mama, this saddens me. I am happy when women in crisis pregnancies choose to keep their baby because it means they are NOT choosing abortion but I can't help but wonder if adoption would be better for these women, especially teenage girls.

Pro-lifers need to start talking about adoption in a positive light. We emphasize so much on saving the baby from abortion, which I am all for, but what about after the baby is born. Adoption is an option that these women should hear about. Pro-life counselors should educate themselves on the adoption process to help ease the fears that women may have and give them correct information about common adoption misconceptions. I commend the women who know that in their heart the best thing for their child is adoption. They are displaying sacrificial love and as someone who will hopefully adopt someday, I thank them!

A lot of the times adoption is looked at like it is a sad thing whether you are adopting or have been adopted. Why is adoption such a bad word in our society? When telling people that you are adopting they kind of give you a funny look somewhere in between sadness for you and wonder of why you would want to do this. Well you wouldn't give that same look to a couple who is pregnant after having struggled to get pregnant would you?! No, you would be excited and happy for them! JJ and I are excited about having the chance to adopt and I just wish that others around us were excited for us too.

That is my rant for today!


  1. Good points! There are so many reasons that pro-life ministry should include adoption plus resources for moms who have miscarried and those going through infertility. Another one, in addition to what you've said here, is that infertile couples often turn to IVF and other procedures that are definitely not pro-life. I often wonder if IVF would have never caught on if the medical world had really tried to discover underlying causes of infertility.

    Also, I think that's so, so sad that women would rather abort their child than give him or her up for adoption. =(

    Praying for you!

  2. I wholeheartedly agree that there needs to be more support in our church and society for women/couples who have miscarried, those who would like to make a sacrifice and keep their babies and then give them up for adoption, and for those who desire to adopt.

    I wonder if people have a sense of sadness about adoption, because deep down they know it is best for a child to be brought up by his biological mom and dad (in a perfect world). It's funny, though, because if you were to ask those same people what they think about egg and sperm donation, they probably wouldn't even recognize that that is one of the reasons that it is disordered. In a perfect world, children should be brought up by their biological parents.

    But, I agree, that it would be so great if more people would react to the special calling of adoption with joy, because a child who doesn't live in a perfect world is going to be loved so much by a family who will take him/her in as their own! So beautiful!

    Prayers for you and your husband.

  3. LOVE your rant! :-) And I need to get back on the adoption document I started for the St. Gerard group. I am a Type A personality, so I have a perfectionist / organizational tendency to make sure things are "just right." Anyway ... it is still coming! :)
    I would LOVE to have more focus on Infertility, Miscarriage, Stillbirth & Adoption from the Church. Even NFP in our diocese isn't really talked about.

  4. Amen! (and trying to do my part in my li'l corner of the world)